Walking away from a narcissistic or borderline parent felt like regaining freedom.
But then I realized the voices, fears, and reflexes didn’t stay behind — they had moved with me.
At first, the physical distance gave me room to breathe, but it didn’t necessarily bring peace or closure.
In my magical thinking, I believed it would automatically heal the wounds and scars left by years in a destructive, dysfunctional environment.
But the brutal truth was that I was still deeply entangled on a multitude of levels — invisible strings that I had to cut through, one by one.

Real liberation begins when you start to unhook the conditioning that still lives in your body, your thoughts, and your choices — when you finally learn to give yourself what your parents never could.

This is where the healing truly begins: the slow, patient rebuilding of an inner world that no longer revolves around survival.
You learn to recognize your own needs without shame, to comfort yourself through fear without collapsing, to hold your truth without demanding others agree with it.
You stop searching for the apology that will never come and start giving yourself the love, safety, and respect you’ve always deserved.

True freedom from abusive entanglements lies not in rebellion, not in fighting against — because that only keeps you inside the destructive loop.
Independence reveals itself instead in the quiet return to self-authority — to self-empowerment — the inner point where compassion and boundaries meet, where love no longer requires self-abandonment, and where peace is not granted by others but radiates from within.